Hold on a second

You would probably have a complete idea of what I shall be penning down about, forget about the title if you want and focus on the content. Well, you might not be willing to agree with me at certain points, you might just feel like obviously no this is not the way, you might feel like cross questioning my thoughts and views and also you might end up reading just a bit and would desperately just click on that “back” icon but believe me, hold on a second, a gesture of humble engagement in going through every word and reaching out for its depths might just dare to steal around half an hour or so, but won’t be causing any harm, I assure you.

We, as humans, take pride in concluding that humans are meant to commit mistakes and contemptuously we go ahead with it claiming it to be normal. Sadly, we couldn’t even realise that what we consider as normal, isn’t normal at all. It is like knocking the door and delivering cakes with syrup carrying bitter flavours so it might only look sweet as colourful toppings until you grab it and put it into your mouth, have that first bite and for a second, blank as dumb as you can’t figure out what you just had. You’ll rightly get what I just said after a while. 

If a manager could make sure that he is absolutely focused while tallying the balances, If an accountant could make sure that his computations are crystal clear, If  a student could make sure that he doesn’t go wrong at any point while solving the mathematical steps, then why can’t a normal human being set for the same track? You see, all of them, apart from considering themselves as just usual human beings carry their respective designations with which they simply can’t count a chance of committing a mistake as they apparently know that a single mistake shall call for a heavy price but on the other way around, the same people wouldn’t be giving it a second thought while committing the same on a general basis. Why? Because, no rule books, no terms and conditions section, no protocols has ever boldly stated that “committing mistakes leading to a cramp in the heart isn’t a mistake but a blunder”; which ironically not even calls for a price. Ah for many of us, how we wish it could isn’t it?

The problem we face is, we actually carry a record of  destruction way more than a list of creations! There exists a very meagre percentage who could let us know that a stone repleted with betterment bears tons of weight while a rock choked with blunders and wreckage is nothing but shallow! Well, reaching out to that particular percentage and holding on to it isn’t really possible in today’s world, but again, it’s okay it is not obviously a curse being a human, it is just a residing cell in each of us that deserves purification thoroughly, and for that we shall be hiring our own selves instead and shall be coming up as not only a better guiding spirit but an even better refiner for this. What say? 

Why does that fact of changing calls for an immediate denial in your mind? What is it that you take pride in? What do you think stands in between you and your alterations?Attitude? Ego? Individuality? What do you think how you employ the ones mentioned? I would not say all this isn’t needed or important but even you know it well that till date, you’ve been using all the three characteristics not for a better cause, but for delivering an ache to a heart in some way or the other. So won’t you agree? Have you never ever formulated a damage in someone else’s life and behaved in a way that it couldn’t be your hand but that person’s mistake of taking you wrong ? Or may be you didn’t even realise at a point that you could’ve done so and so? Or at some point may be you would’ve even denied recognising yourself as the one? Even if what I’m saying is offensive and you’re in no mood to agree with me at any point, I’m pretty sure that you could possibly agree with yourself at least, may be somewhere deep inside with the voice that records every guilt of yours. 

You know every person we come across, every person with whom we connect, every person whom we allow to walk into our lives, unknowingly fabricate a kind of space for us thus letting us into their lives as well and the most interesting part is, whatever we step with or whatever we do during our temporary stay in that little space builds a forever mark when we choose to leave. You might think the moment you leave, that space either remains empty or it fills after a certain period of time right? But my dear, it doesn’t! For it never has, never was and never will. You leave a mark after you whose depth shall only be known to that creator of the space you stayed in, and no one else not even you! Ever thought of it? Keep that answer to yourself. It is anyway known. 

If you ask me, then I never really calculated the number of times I could’ve wounded a heart, but I can definitely let you know how many more times I did punish myself for being the reason though. No wait, punishing yourself doesn’t mean you got to leave physical marks on your skin but yes, the punishment should be deep enough to remind you of your sins. My dear, causing even a mere carve to one’s heart is equal to a sin. Yes it is!

Would be lying if I say mistakes ain’t healthy, they are!  For you tend to not reshow the display which happens to be a pain in the eyes, but are you sure in between using this healthy way of making yourself  a better person, you ain’t or you weren’t submerging someone else in that process?

Why can’t you simply barge the usual irrelevant concepts and dare to hoist a new flag of betterment, of prosperity? Can’t you? Get out of that bubble! Look out for yourself, recognise the real human in you! No you won’t follow those “humans” phrases but you’ll follow the “human” phrase solely named by you! 

Hold on a second and let your ears to that voice that rightly leads you. You simply can’t afford to underestimate that inner voice that keeps a history of every such guilt of yours but might be the pitch isn’t that high to knock your pulse every time you repeat the same. The moment you’ll start setting an example by putting forth a thought of building a heart rather than demolishing one, then you’ll see the increasing range of followers patting your back. Is it so tough to feed a spoonful of gratitude and love to a person rather than leaving cureless stretched marks in one’s life? Is it so tough to lend a hand in one’s growth rather than finding ways to prove yourself the ultimate by overthrowing one? 

How do I tell you that sorry is just a word? You see, the more you utter the word on an on and ever, the word seems to lose its dignity over time. Instead, what you can do is, just use your steps cautiously beforehand and even if you fail, do not let that failure cause a major effect in one’s life. How about feeling that you’re sorry and, with keeping no stone unturned spreading a carpet of efforts for those eyes to lay on? Remember, your guilt isn’t your weakness it’s your strength! It never hurts your ego in fact, it builds the individuality in you! If you’ve ever been wrong at any point of your life, just don’t think twice while reconstructing it. Hold on a second again, take a step back, arrange what you had immorally scattered, and then step ahead. Don’t you worry you won’t fall behind, but rise and only rise!   

 

Shrestha .S. Purkayastha